Time Change Ties Me In Knots

motivational speakers time change dilemmaI'm a professional keynote speaker. You would think that requires a certain level of intelligence. But just at that point where I'm considering myself to be quite bright, the time change happens again – and sends me into a corner staring at the walls and counting my fingers.

I do this every year – enter into the time change mind teaser. Okay, is it Spring forward and Fall back, or Fall back and Spring forward? Both make sense and yet neither makes sense. Okay, so it's one hour – I get that – forward, forward, forward, forward. I have to repeat it as I change it, or I will forget and go the other way. And I can't do it when the clock is on 11:59 because that whole "59" part throws me off – as well as the fact that I never quite figured out when 12:00 is am and when it is pm.

And then I enter into the "is it going to be darker or lighter now" discussion. Will it be darker when I go to bed? When it's eight, is it really seven? Or is it really nine? And when I wake up will it be lighter or darker? And does this mean I'm losing an hour, or gaining an hour? And if I just go to bed an hour later, or is it earlier, can I just make up for it? And I lay there in bed wondering if it's really seven or really eight – and should I be extra rested or sleep deprived? And was this the clock I forgot to change? Or did I somehow change it twice?

And what if I'm traveling to a state that's an hour behind me? Or heaven help me, two hours behind? And then I get home and have to figure out how to move it ahead three hours and back two – or is it one? And what if I'm in the air on a plane when the time changes and it's like 11:59 pm or am – whatever – and the time changes, is it really today, or yesterday? Or am I dangling on the precipice of some sort of time vortex? And if you buy an airline ticket months before the time change, for a trip you are taking after the time change – which time do they put on the ticket – the before time or the after time?

Maybe this time change is just somebody's idea of making sure I don't ever think I'm smarter than I really am. It's working.



Motivational Speaker Kelly Swanson - called one of North Carolina's funniest women by Our State Magazine. Kelly lifts the spirits of audiences from coast-to-coast using humor, storytelling, and lives of the characters from Prides Hollow - Kelly's make believe small town. This unique approach to motivational speaking allows Kelly to break through communications barriers and connect directly to the audience's imagination.
Her powerful stories and wacky wit will make you laugh, remind you that you matter, show you how to see beyond your obstacles, and teach you how to stand up and stick out in a crowded market.
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  1. Funny motivational speakers come and go, but Kelly Swanson, you are one-of-a-kind, here to stay and fabulously brilliant. That was sooooooo funny.  And sadly, I can relate to everything you said. I LOVE it!

  2. Thanks Linda! Don't feel bad. I am not the only one who has issues with this. Turns out there are many women out there (and maybe even some men) who grapple with this time challenge. Turns out we are a lot more normal than we thought. Oh my – this world really is in a state if this funny keynote speaker is the new normal!

  3. I thought it was just me!  Funny stuff, Kelly, and so nice to be in the company of two funny keynote speakers (referencing Miss Linda above) with the same confusion.  Luckily I was able to figure out that it was NOT a good idea to go to a party Saturday night because I had to get up at 5:00 (meaning 4:00) the next morning!!  Still adjusting, are you?

  4. Glad you're part of the club Polly! :)

  5. I dislike any math that makes you have one less hour in a day! My concern is that I got to all the clocks in the house so one day soon I don't show up an hour late. Funny read!

  6. Last year my clock changed by itself a week early (don't even ask how that happened) and I was late for church.  Can you believe I had to say to my coordinator at church (I'm a Eucharistic Minister) that I was late because my clock changed the time a week early?  Imagine her look on my face when she reminded me that mass starts at noon!!

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