Ten Things You Should Never Do In An Airport, by Motivational Speaker Kelly Swanson

motivational speakers deep thoughtsTen things you should never do in an airport
by motivational speaker Kelly Swanson

  • Never eat chili before your flight.
  • It’s not a good idea to ask the flight attendant if she could please repeat those safety instructions.
  • Never wear Spandex if you’re traveling more than three hours.
  • It’s not a good idea to turn to your neighbor on the plane and say, “Do you hear that rattling noise?”
  • Don’t tap your foot in the next stall of the lady’s restroom in the airport. She won’t think that’s funny.
  • Do not ask the security agent if she gets paid overtime to pat down plus sized people.
  • Don’t pack a ticking clock in your carry on.
  • Never think you can just poot a little on the plane.
  • Don’t sit in the exit row and tell people if they’re not nice to you, they’re getting out last.
  • Don’t ask the security agent if that invasive pat down was as good for him as it was for you, and if this means he’s going to call you.

And there you have it – ten things you should never do in an airport.

Trust me.


Motivational Speaker Kelly Swanson - called one of North Carolina's funniest women by Our State Magazine. Kelly lifts the spirits of audiences from coast-to-coast using humor, storytelling, and lives of the characters from Prides Hollow - Kelly's make believe small town. This unique approach to motivational speaking allows Kelly to break through communications barriers and connect directly to the audience's imagination.
Her powerful stories and wacky wit will make you laugh, remind you that you matter, show you how to see beyond your obstacles, and teach you how to stand up and stick out in a crowded market.
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  1. I’m only smiling at this post Kelly because I can picture you doing all but one of these things!!!!! These are from experience aren’t they?

  2. Ha ha ha ha. I carried on a tuna sandwich once from home and proceded to unwrap it and chow down after we took off. 135 people got off the plane in Atlanta smelling like tuna. It wasn’t pretty.

  3. In 2001 security checked me every leg of the way because I still had luggage with no wheels (hey, it was still a perfectly good high school graduation present!). Also, i now tie back my very big hair because they’ve rifled through my “do” a few too many times! Ah, the joys of traveling!

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