Sherri Shepherd Was Snubbed???

As a motivational speaker, I’m on the road a lot. But when I’m home I like to treat myself to downtime with several television shows.  Modern Family makes me laugh. Dancing With the Stars allows me to live vicariously as the fabulous dancer I see myself (in my mind) through the talents of others, and The View simultaneously thrills and frustrates me – while I actually learn stuff.  This morning – I indulged in The View.

First of all, who doesn’t love Sherri Shepherd. She’s funny, loving, warm, spicy and fabulous. So when she mentioned this morning that a woman at her son’s soccer camp had blatantly snubbed her several times, I was intrigued. She told her co-hosts that it was very upsetting to her and asked what she should do about it.  One of the co-hosts suggested that she ask the woman out for coffee, and one suggested she let it go.

Okay. She didn’t ask me. But here’s my advice.

Be straight, Sherri. Straight, respectful, kind and unflappable.  Walk right up to her and say, “Carol (or whatever her name is), I’ve noticed than when I try to engage you in a conversation, you leave very quickly. Yesterday when I said hi to you, you starting waving to someone behind me and ran past me.  When I turned around to see who you were waving to, there was no one there.  Carol, I’m thinking I may have done something to inadvertently offend you, and if that’s the case, I would welcome the opportunity to fix it.  Have I offended you in some way?”

Now – the ball is in Carol’s court. If she says yes – then Sherri has the opportunity to correct the situation. If she says n0 – then Sherri can say, “I’m sorry then. I must have misinterpreted your actions And I do look forward to getting to know you better.” (While flashing that big old fabulous Sherri Shepherd smile.)

My belief is that problems like this don’t just go away. They sit around and fester and cause people to feel frustration, anger, confusion and resentment – emotions that can very negatively impact how we communicate – AND the quality of results we get in our lives.

So step up, oh mightily offended ones! Step up, be clear, respectful, and straight. You’ll be glad you did.

From motivational speaker, Linda Larsen, declining to be snubbed

 

About

Motivational Speaker Linda Larsen, CSP has been described by meeting planners and audiences as "hysterically funny," and "riveting." Known for her ability to connect on an authentic and emotional level with audiences, her spontaneous sense of humor, and her engaging and powerful stories, Linda is passionate about sharing ideas to help people live their finest, best, and most productive lives. Her riveting and true story of being kidnapped and held hostage at gunpoint by an escaped convict, and the strategies she used to escape, will give people the tools THEY need to rise above any of life's toughest challenges, to communicate more effectively with THEIR difficult person, and to find creative solutions to THEIR problems. To book motivational speaker, Linda Larsen: 941-927-4700
http://www.lindalarsen.com

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Comments

  1. This is awesome advice.  Then, after saying what your recommend, she should let it go.  There are people who will snub us no matter how articulate, compassionate, even-tempered and logical we are.  There are people who have never read a book on effective communication skills, let alone participate in dialogues like this.  I’m so glad I hang with people like you and Colette and Kelly who would never snub!  Just say no to the snub!!!!

  2. Would you consider sending this to The View to share your excellent advice with Shari? Seriously. It rocks. Great advice and insight.

    • Well, thank you Colette!  Following your good advice,, I just went onto the View site and boy – it was challenging to find a place where I could sent it.  I finally did find a little email form and copied and pasted the blog post in there with an offer for Sherri to take a look.  Wouldn’t it be great if someone actually did read it!  Thank you again for the suggestion!

  3. Great post Linda! Even being a motivational speaker, my tendency is to want to bash verbally bash the snubber instead of addressing it. Why? Because it’s so much fun to call my sister and say, “Can you believe she just did that? And then spend an hour plotting revenge.”  It’s so much easier to assume I know exactly what she meant by that gesture, and be angry for it. But easy isn’t always right. How we perceive another person’s actions, is not necessarily how they were intended. And the big girl thing to do is just what you said – address it in a kind, loving, clear way, dealing with specifics instead of generalities. I think if we did that more, we wouldn’t get our feelings hurt as often – and the world would be a kinder place. 

  4. PS I’m going to share this blog. I think we all should share it!

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