Ode To My Pregnancies

pregnantNow here's a shocker of a post,yes??  This motivational speaker is speaking to a Holistic Mom's group tonight and out of my scratch pad of notes on the subject appeared this poem/ode/rap song (hahaha)!  Just thought I'd throw it out there to all of our readers for a change of pace.

Hemorrhoids, indigestion, zits all over my chin,

The joy of eating big and not holding my stomach in!


Waited for them, didn’t see them, “Stretch marks” I would tell ‘em

“Won’t dare appear with coconut schmear”, like a big greased watermelon.


Taught step class and aerobics up to the bitter end

And learned that inner thigh work was really NOT my friend.

You see the hormone called Relaxin loosens lower body joints

So no inner thighs or heavy lifting – 2 very crucial points!


Ninth month, hot July, ten days overdue,

The best relief was floating free in our warm Gulf waters of blue.


I’ll never forget the connection I felt to the entire Animal Kingdom

Or the shifting of our future … with just the absence of a condom.


One birth was Steve, the other Sam, the apples of my eye

I gave them all the best I have, my wallet…flat it lies.


Let's hope this group tonight has a sense of humor!


Motivational Speaker Polly Pitchford didn’t always know the phytochemical benefits of kale, in fact, those words weren’t even in her vocabulary 30 years ago. Neither did she see any reason to do jumping jacks on a cement surface for an hour. But all it took was a chance vegetarian cooking class and some high-energy music to open her eyes upon a whole new world of healthy living. For 30 years Polly has practiced, studied, taught, educated and lived a healthy lifestyle that makes her such a powerful speaker.

Polly’s down-to-Earth and humorous approach mirrors her own lifelong journey to lasting, positive changes. The audience walks away with tangible plans for improving their health and their lives through food, fitness and fun.
To book Motivational Speaker Polly Pitchford, call 941-685-7725 or visit her at http://www.pollypitchfordmotivationalspeaker.com/

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  1. Now that's a youtube video I'd like to see!  Motivational Speaker Polly Pitchford Raps on Having kids!  Are you going to use this tonight?  I hope so!  You'll rock it sister!

  2. Oh my gosh – how cute are YOU!  Did you know in that picture that you would be a motivational speaker when you grew up?  And oh how lucky are those women going to be to have YOU sharing your wisdom with them!  

  3. Love this, Polly. Made me smile big. Especially the wallet prose!!

  4. Love it! Love it! Love it!!!!!!!!!!!!

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