Oh we all know exactly what that person can do to totally piss us off, right? My list, while it may not be long, it is VERY specific. Tell me you can totally replace the backyard fence in one day (when we are leaving on vacation three days later) and I know precisely where we are headed. When I say, "I appreciate your offer – and I firmly, adamantly and unequivocally decline. We will hire someone to do it," I EXPECT your litany of how much money we'll save and how YOU can do it better anyway, and how it's such a ridiculously easy project. And somehow, even when I think I've gotten your agreement to let a professional do the job, you end up doing it.
And here we are, the night before leaving for a 7:00 a.m. flight. And where are you? Outside madly putting up the fence. In the backyard, building a fricking fence, where you have been for the last full 3 days and two nights – working at breakneck speed. While I'm on the INSIDE doing my work, and yours. I didn't have time to get MYSELF ready for the trip, and now I'm taking care of all your to-do items. Snark, grrrr, gnash, gnash…
For the first time in my life, I'm considering some honker pharmaceuticals. Of course, I don't even know what to ask for. What calms you down? Zantac? No wait, that's for heartburn. Well, I have that too so what the heck.
And then it happened. As I'm frantically searching through the files for the "Home and pet instructions for the house sitter" to print out and get ready for tomorrow, I see a file with a very intriguing title. It says "To John Joseph Scalzi 2-14-13." I don't remember writing it so I open it up to read it. That's when an extremely weird thing happened. It was a 3 minute read and by the end of it, I was absolutely no longer upset with my husband. None. Nada. Zip. Gone. In fact I felt so much love and gratitude for him that I almost cried.
Here was the full title of the document:
To John Joseph Scalzi – My Amazing Weather Muffin
25 things I love and appreciate about you
I then listed 25 brilliant amazing qualities that he embodies. Here are 21 of them so you can get a feeling for why reading this paper totally shifted my emotional state:
- Your constant state of happiness – which makes me very happy
- The way you look at me like I am the most wonderful woman in the world
- How much you love and care for others
- Your laugh
- Your fearlessness (hello – that's exactly what he was demonstrating out in the yard!)
- Your passion – for EVERYTHING (even building fences)
- Your generosity
- How hard you work (there it is again)
- How FUN you are!
- How forgiving you are of my foibles
- How much you love our house and yard (Hellooooooo)
- Your exquiste talent at so many things (even fence building)
- That my feelings are very important to you (okay we'll skip this one…)
- That you let me pick out your clothes
- How you love all my friends as much as I do
- Your love our of doggies (and wouldnt want them to get out of the yard!)
- What an AMAZING cook you are!
- Your WICKED great sense of humor
- How much you LOVE learning new things (like how to build a fence…)
- Your love of theater and the arts
Forgive me for not revealing the other five items. Just use your imagination…
So there you go. Why not write a list of your own. Now, while you are in a happy, loving, appreciative mood. Then pull it out when you need it most. Like when your partner/spouse/lover accidently drives the car through the garage door.
Oh don't laugh. You've seen worse.