Got Boundaries? 4 Steps to Saying No

Communication-Speaker-Colette-CarlsonIt's easy to get into habits or patterns in life especially when it comes to personal boundaries. Perhaps you're the one who always drives when you go out with friends or the hostess with the mostess for every candle, cookware or clothing in-home party. If you run with a bunch of bad drivers or love to pretend your home is a retail outlet, that's one thing. But it's another when you're craving some down time but simply can't say no.

And this former people-pleasing, motivational speaker is speaking the truth when I say you'll never have balance without boundaries. Read how I turned things around in an article posted here.

Remember, saying no doesn't make you a horrible, terrible, nasty person. Instead it makes you able to find the time to say yes to what's most important to you. From your former boundary-less motivational speaker.



Step into the Truth Booth, improve your life, and laugh along the way with funny motivational speaker Colette Carlson. How did she go from emotional coward and the Pizza Delivery’s favorite customer to #1 sales producer for sales legend Tom Hopkins and Brian Tracy, featured in Success Magazine, a 50 lb. weight loss, and inspiring audiences at Microsoft, Accenture, Pepsi, Boeing, and organizations worldwide? Visit her at or call 760-230-1212.

Colette founded Speak Your Truth, Inc. to share her success systems and inspire others to Think It! Speak It! Live It! Her tools and takeaways create authentic, long-lasting change in every aspect of your life. With a MA in human behavior, a successful business and 2 teenage daughters, Colette provides a unique combination of education, research, real-life experience, and heartfelt humor to motivate you with her high content programs. Improve your Communication Skills, Work-Life Balance, Sales, Leadership, Assertiveness, Negotiation…all wrapped in the genuine power of Speaking Your Truth.

Did you enjoy this post? Just jot down your email and we'll keep you up-to-date with all of our motivation and entertainment.

Delivered by FeedBurner


  1. You don’t need the “sterner stuff” of a motivational speaker to break free of the draining plague of being asked to do everything, simply because you’ve been nice enough to help others in the past. Unfortunately, those who ask for help tend to descend like a flock of buzzards on anyone who shows a willingness to help at any point in time. Ever give to a charity? All of a sudden they’re calling you every other week for a contribution. Make a political contribution? Now you’re getting non-stop “personal” robo-calls from your favorite candidate. Volunteer for a cause close to home? Oh boy, you’re their go to guy.
    We all have limited time and resources to help others. At some point, we all need to decide for ourselves how much we can contribute to other. There is something very liberated in a polite, firm ‘No’. 

  2. Bill, I love when you weigh in. Especially since we’re not at a Weight Watchers meeting. Which is exactly where I ended up when I couldn’t say no. It was my unhealthy way of dealing with all my emotional stress. And you’re so right about once you help, people keep asking.  And given the talent of one particular motivational speaker we both know,  it’s hard for even me to stop asking! Are you going to be changing said speaker’s phone and email address soon?! I would certainly understand.

  3. GREAT stuff, Colette! Motivational speakers are on the road a LOT and it makes it difficult sometimes when you are in “go” mode, packing, preparing, focusing and heading in ONE direction – to MAINTAIN that focus and direction with all those interruptions.  Maybe it’s the guilt of feeling like I’m always either leaving – or gone – that makes me want to stop what I’m doing and take care of all those other things.  I’m about a B- on the “saying no” thing, but now I’ll use your Stop Look Listen & Go technique and get even better!

  4. I alternate between saying yes too much (hello college years) and saying no too much (hello church.) I’m trying to find the happy balance in the middle. Thanks for the wonderful reminder. You always inspire me. Even when you don’t mean to. 

Speak Your Mind